Meet Tina, the Pirate. She can raise my Jolly Roger anytime and may well capture me by the Minches. Yes, that is a hornpipe in my pocket and I am happy to see you.

I don't get the Pirate thing. There is a ship missing, presumed taken by pirates, in the North Sea. It is a Russian vessel and I dare say the Russians are not happy. But my point is, why on earth don't these vessels carry cannons and blow the buggers out of the water at the first sign of trouble? It wouldn't have happened in Nelson's day.

If however, you should be unlucky enough to come across these scurvy ruffians, this website should help.


Capt Blackbeard said...

I see the ship has now been spotted in the Atlantic. But it has secret ' undisclosed' cargoes. Another good conspiracy theory about to get us all excited.
Most captains don't want weapons onboard. Usually causes more harm than good. A watercannon and good lookout should help.
The main story about the pirates in Somalia etc is 'Why they do it'.
Great programme on last week about it. Factory fishing ships have hoovered up most of the fish around the horn of Africa. Paying off corrupt leaders for the priviledge. Local fishermen who fished there for thousands of years are no longer able to catch anything unless they go hundreds of miles into the ocean. The only alternative is piracy. It could be stopped overnight if the shipping went further out to sea but the owners are too tight on saving fuel.

Spartan said...

The Somali fishermen were losing their fish so they run up the Jolly Roger and decided to take the law into their own hands. Unfortunately the Somali fishermen have very poor recognition skills and so instead of taking over illegal fishing vessels they took tankers, cargo ships and the like. The owners of these pirated vessels then offered the Somali fishermen much loot to get the vessels back again???

l'm sure that if the fishing grounds were restored, these pirates would go back to their simple way of life and cease the lucrative lifestyle they now have? Yeah right!

A few .50 cals mounted on vessels would be my answer and to Davy Jones locker with them!

For those bleating heart PC chappies ... l'm sure if you all get on a ship and go to Somalia you'll be made most welcome at their numerous makeshift Hotel Californias.

"You can checkout anytime you want but you can never leave".

Any ransom notes would be "Returned to sender ... address unknown" :-)

sad britain said...

" A few .50 cals mounted on vessels would be my answer and to Davy Jones locker with them!"

Ha ha. Typical sad fat cowardly lazy Westerner.
You're chances of that helping are lower than zero.
You've long since sold out.
Feet up watching the One Show while the world moves on.
Lazy and fat. Hiding at the airport at Basra while the US sorts out the baddies. Or getting blown to pieces in Helmand by bombs from Iran.
Joke country with joke mentality.
Sad people led by the gay bum loving twat called Mandelbum gaylord of Foy.

Spartan said...

Like being savaged by a dead sheep :-)

Anonymous said...

wired had an interesting article on this subject. The verdict being that it is actually so profitable for all involved including shipping company claiming insurance, insurance companies higher premiums, security companies payment for handling ransoms and rescue, and obviously the pirates that no-one wants it to stop. So there is almost an established code of practice now between the compannies pirates and security firms. i.e. no-one gets hurt = everyone gets paid