Cyril Snead, a convicted rapist with a history of violence and terrible blogging has today complained that the police use unfair profiling procedures when trying to identify perpetrators of recent violent crimes. Speaking from inside Marbella Open Prison, Snead, 52, said, "I find it offensive that everytime a sex crime with violence was committed in Didsbury (Snead's former home) I was picked up and interviewed. Why aren't they arresting Weird people with bouffant hair and a liking for choral music and pringle sweaters? I would have thought they are the most obvious suspects in cases where poor women, who, let's face it are up for it if they wear Jimmy Choos and a halter neck top, are raped and then cut up a bit.
Speaking in Mr Snead's defence, Bernice Sansmates, MP for Didsbury, said:
Now that we have secured the right to vote for people like Mr Snead, he will be able to take a more pro-active part in this multisexual society, a society which delights in diversity of sexual needs and life-style choices. Indeed, when Labour is once back in power, we shall be ring-fencing £9 millon to promote rapist cohesion within all inner city communities and encouraging local schools to have convicted rapists come and talk about their adventures.